My first day

Today was the day that I finally started working after being unemployed for almost 3 months. I started at the Scott Greening Center as a Community Support Worker. I spent most of the day watching another CSW doing her job and this gave me an idea of what this place is all about. Basically, the center is a drug and alcohol treatment for a residential treatment program. The kids are bused in every morning and stay the whole day and return to residential treatment at night. A CSW, meets with the kids and does one on one counseling with them and coordinate any other services.
It's different from what I'm used too. The first thing I noticed was that you don't get out much. Your clients are already there. I also noticed that a lot of these kids don't want to go home and miss behave on purpose.
I liked a lot of the people I met today, but I really don't think I'll be there for very long. I think I might like the job, but the fact is that the pay sucks. It's well below what I was hoping for. So, my job search continues. The problem is sneaking out for interviews. I think I could only use the doctor excuse so many times.
Comprehensive Mental Health wants a third interview to see if I would be interested in an child Case Manager position. I was hoping one day to break away from youth, but I would take the position. It is a little further and it is at a hourly rate, but the pay is much better and it is out in the community.

Woogy

I decided that this blog, I will dedicate to my son, Woogy and some of his accomplishments at 3. He is definitely seeking our attention more. He seems to want to be constantly entertained. I assume this is just an adjustment to Nibbles coming in the family. He has started playing "Star Wars" (something I use to do when I was a kid). He likes to challenge me with his lightsabers. I have to admit, that I like playing lightsabers more than Thomas or Bob the Builder.
If he doesn't want to play Star Wars, he wants to play on the PS2. Of course, he can't even load a game, but he loves to watch me play and share the controller. Don't worry, we are not playing anything rated "m". He also loves to play games on the computer, and this has taught him a little about the internet. He knows how to turn on the internet and click to his favorite site "Nick Jr" and can play almost any game on his own. Not bad for a three year old.
I think the most amazing thing is how much Spanish he knows. He can count to 15 in Spanish, knows all his colors, and can form complete sentences. I think a lot of this comes from watching "Dora" and "Deigo". It doesn't hurt, that his babysitter speaks Spanish around him. I think it is pretty cool that he knows more Spanish now, than I knew in college.
This is the first year that I think he is aware of Santa Claus. On Saturday, I took Woogy to go see the "Polar Express" in I Max and 3D. Even though the movie was geared for kids, I thought it was really cool. The 3D made the movie feel like virtual reality. The animation was spectacular. Woogy enjoyed the movie and began asking questions about Santa. I think Wah Wah is really looking forward to him in believing.
With Woogy knowing how to operate the internet and becoming fluent in Spanish, it's amazing that he is not potty trained. He is aware of what the potty is for, and we have offered him every incentive we can think of, but it doesn't help. He'll be 4 in another six month's, so I'm starting to get a little worried.

Finally- an offer

After two month's of searching, I finally got my first job offer. The Scott Greening Center offered me a position as a community support worker. I did accept it, but I plan to continue to search for another job. I like the location and what I'd be doing, but the pay sucks. If I stuck with it, it would definitely be an adjustment financially.
However, other places are coming around that would pay better. Today I interviewed at Crittion Hospital and drove out to a middle school in Raytown to interview for a school based position. She invited me to go out and visit the high school that I would be working at. The job begins real early in the morning (7 am) but would be off by 4pm. Another perk is that I would have the summers off with a option of working part time in one of their units.
I also interviewed for the state as a child abuse investigator, but I don't think that is going to work. First, the job requires a lot of traveling to all parts of the state and you are on call 24/7 (I don't think Wah-Wah would like that). The job is very challenging and I would take it, but I don't think the interview went that well. Lots of long silences between questions. The guy interviewing me was telling me how important grammar is on the job and then he pointed out an error I made on my resume. So I'm not expecting that one to work.
I did get a call back to Jewish Vocational Services to meet the staff, so I'm a little hopeful there. Tomorrow, I interview at Farmers Insurance. If I have to talk about all I know about insurance, it should be a short interview. Next week I interview at Comprehensive Mental Health. I know a few people there so I might have a chance.
The biggest surprise of all is that I actually received a call from Johnson County Mental Health wanting to set up a interview. I can't believe it. Johnson County is like the god of mental health centers. Their salaries can't be matched. I've been applying there for years, and I finally have a interview.

Not the best Thanksgiving

I'd like to say that I enjoyed my thanksgiving weekend, but I didn't. It started late Weds night when Woogy threw up at my parents house. I had the feeling that this wasn't going to be good. We then drove up to Cedar Rapids to spend Thanksgiving with Wah-Wah's parents. By the time we arrived, Woogy was pretty sick and throwing up and just wanted to lay down.
Dinner at Wah-Wah's family was pretty good. I enjoy the basic Thanksgiving foods, not the exotic ones that my mom makes. The next day, Woogy was feeling better, so we did some X-mas shopping in Cedar Rapids. By late afternoon Wah-Wah was feeling ill. At this point I realized that the bug Woogy got was pretty contagious. That evening, Wah-Wah was really sick. She had the shakes and chills (of course every virus seems to hit Wah-Wah harder than anyone else). It was pretty hard to feed Nibbles (I changed Pinky's name. Nibbles is more appropriate) since Wah Wah was so sick. Watching Wah- Wah be so sick made me pretty nervous that my time was coming.
On Saturday, Wah-Wah was feeling better, so we drove back to Des Moines to have Thanksgiving dinner with my family. Shortly after dinner with them, I got it. I threw up most of that night. By the morning, I felt so weak that I slept till 1 in the afternoon. Since Wah Wah has to sit in the back seat with the kids, it was up to me to drive back to KC. The drive was awful. Not only did I feel sick and weak, but we hit some pretty major storms.
Well I feel fine now and so does everyone else, which is good because I have a lot of interviews this week. I just did my interview with Jewish Vocational Services (no you don't need to be Jewish to work there). Basically the job is helping people in the area as well as refugees from other countries find a job. I thought the interview went well-but that doesn't mean anything. The cool thing about this place is that you get not only Christian holidays off, but Jewish holidays too. Anyway, the interviewer showed me around the office and said she would like to set up a second interview.
I have two important interviews tomorrow. The first one is for the state of Missouri investigating suspected child abuse(I've been involved in those investigations and they are not fun). The second interview is in Raytown High School as a school based CM. It sounds like something I'd like to do. Then on Thursday, I have a interview at Farmer's Insurance as a claims adjuster. Hopefully something will happen soon.

An Awkward moment

Last Saturday I took Woogy to the movie theater to see "Chicken Little". While waiting in line, behind me I noticed Randy, my former director was right behind me. What a small world this is. What are the odds of former boss standing right behind me in the line to see Chicken Little on a Saturday night at the same therater?
I figured it had to be astronomical. How come things like this happen? This isn't the first time that I've run into that one person I'm trying to avoid in a big public place. Back in Iowa, I must have run into 3 ex girlfriends (relationships that ended pretty badly).
Well anyway, I hate Randy. This is the guy that fired me only to later bring me back, then turn me down. I used to have a lot of respect for this guy, but now his "calm-therapeutic" voice makes me sick. He tried to talk to me and ask me about my son, but I just walked away. I don't think I've ever been that openly rude before, but oh well.

I don't expect much to happen this week as far as job hunting goes. Today I interviewed at the Scott Greening Center in downtown KC. I was real excited about this interview, but once the director showed me the salary, it became difficult to still smile. The interview went well, but it's not the end of the world if I don't get it.
After the interview, I drove out to Independence to the Comprehensive Mental Health Center and ran into some old co workers from Wyandotte. They couldn't believe that I had been fired. They said that Comprehensive was alright and it didn't have all the BS that Wyandotte has. I was applying for a different dept, so I don't know if they could get me a reference but they said that they would try.

Time for a update

I've begun to lose count of how many unemployment updates I've done, but I thought I would do a update anyway. Let's see, I had no real interviews last week except for the one at Kelly temp services. Last Friday, I wasted 3 hrs at Kelly temp. After taking three hours of test, I was offered a sweet job at the Encore call center- answering phone calls for a whopping $8 an hour. As tempting as that offer was, I decided to turn it down since I realized I could make more on unemployment and save more money staying home with the kids
Hopefully this week was more fruitful. I visited a small mental health center in downtown KC. I can't even recall the name, but the staff was very friendly and showed me around before I filled out an application. It looked like a place I would want to work, so we'll see what happens there. I also tried a different temp agency-Celebrity Staffing, and to my amazement passed all their test with the computer. Now I go back on Thursday for more testing. I hope it isn't another $8 job. I also was invited in for a interview at Farmer's Insurance (Shakedust referred me to this one). This means that I passed their phone interview I guess.
I would say I've had a streak of rotten luck lately, but I got a really nice surprise in the mail last Saturday. My grandmother (who I haven't talked to in 15 yrs) sent me a really nice generous check. She had sold her house in Florida, and moved in with my aunt (who won the Florida lottery). She decided to use some of that money to give to her grand children. She even sent a check for Woogy and Pinky. Well that prompted me to call her and talk to her for a while. She even talked to Woogy for the first time. She invited us to Florida sometime soon and go visit Disney. Woogy would really dig that.
I'm really going to make an effort to get down there sometime. 15 yrs is a long time. I love my Grandma, but she has always lived in a different time zone. My family also has never stayed close to one another.

The joke is on me

After meeting with my two former directors and listening to them praise me, there is no job offer after all. The joke is on me. I received a call from my director and he started saying "you know Brian, you have had a lot of good years at Wyandott Center, but it would be too awkward having you back". So why the hell did you call me back in the first place?
After my meeting, I remember I felt pretty good, like "they really listened" and "they are serious" and "I might actually go back to Wyandott Center". But as the weekend progressed I began to think more logically-"this is too good to be true" and "they aren't that cool. They are not going to toss me a bone"
So when the rejection came Monday morning, it really wasn't much of a surprise. What I regret (among many things) is not telling them off when I had the chance. Tim, the other guy who was fired with me said that when his opportunity came to meet with the directors (two hours before mine), he told them off and called them liars. I thought a different approach would be more useful so I went in and was as courteous as I could be. Big mistake. These were the people that screwed me over and they brought me back for more. I agree with Tim, that they were never serious about bringing us back anyway. They were just trying to appease us. I know it seems strange, but it feels like I've been fired twice, by the same people. I guess the joke is on me.

The difference in generations

Today I took two test for the state of Missouri for social worker positions. I had to go to a government building in downtown KC for the tests. During the break for lunch, I drove around the neighborhood looking for a place to eat. This neighborhood was the hood, I mean the really real hood. This is the neighborhood around Truman and the Paseo. I'm used to going to Quindaro and other ghettos in Wyandotte County, but this neighborhood took poverty to a new level.
I finally found a McDonald's (it was the only open building for miles). While I was standing in line, I noticed one guy accidentally cut in line of this other guy and he was pissed. The other guy apologized and said it was a mistake, but that wasn't good enough for the other guy (who was obviously a gang banger). This gang banger started raving about how he was disrespected and he was going to "Cap your ass". No matter how many times this poor guy apologized, this gang banger was making a scene. Everyone in the McDonald's was watching as the gang banger told this guy he was going to die because he disrespected him, but no one was saying anything.
I'd like to say that I took this opportunity to tell the gang banger about Jesus Christ and how He loves him, but I didn't. I was only white guy around for miles.
After the situation was resolved (the gang banger's quarter pounder was ready, so he left), I ordered and sat down to enjoy my McRib next to these older gentlemen. I over heard their conversation about Christ, Martin Luther King, and other men of peace. They were having a pleasant conversation about philosophy and the importance of loving one another.
I couldn't help but to notice the differences between the situation I had just watched and the conversation taking place. Here are two groups of people with similar socioeconomic situations but differ greatly in age and values. I then began to wonder were did the breakdown in values between generations begin? Why were these old guys talking about peace and love, and the other younger guy was going to "bust your ass" for accidentally cutting in line?

Crawling back to the Center

As previously mentioned, I finally received a long over due call from my old director who wanted to meet with me to discuss the possibility of me returning to the Center that I was abruptly fired from. On Thursday morning, I called the former co worker that was fired the same day I was under "weak circumstances" too. He had the same offer to come in and talk about coming back. He warned me that the dreaded assistant director was there too.
This former coworker said he went in there and told it to them like it is. He said he told them that it was unfair that he was fired and he didn't trust management anymore. I decided to try a different approach since I don't want to be unemployed any longer than I have to. I tried to be kind and courteous to the two people that fired me. Oddly, my director didn't want to talk about why I was fired. They eluded to it being my "judgment", (which I never heard before)and didn't give a specific example of when I used poor judgment. My director was more curious on how I would handle coming back. I told him the truth, that I would focus more on the clients (which I hadn't had since I was a case manager)and I would appreciate a change in departments if possible.
I'd like to say that it went well. I did get a number of comments about what a dedicated and hard worker I was as well as being told I was one of the best CMs. I left there feeling good, like I had done my best and if they didn't hire me back, then they were never serious about me coming back anyway. They were just trying to appease me. My director said he would call me on Monday and let me know.

Job hunting update part 4

And the search continues...Sadly, a couple of jobs that I was excited about last week seem to have busted. Kansas City Regional said "no" and the probation thing didn't work out either. So it is hard to get excited about anything right now. I interviewed today with KC Housing Authority. This would be assisting poor families in finding low income housing. I'd say the interview went well, but who really knows? The guy did ask for my references (that could be encouraging if I wasn't so pessimistic). The pay isn't very good either so I wouldn't be destroyed if I didn't get it.
I'd say the most interesting news came last Friday afternoon. After completely giving up, my old director called me back after 3 weeks of not returning my calls. He asked me to come in on Thursday to "talk about possibly returning". This is what every unemployed person wants to hear. If I do have an opportunity to return, I would take it since there appears to be no other offers on the table (There is still a slight chance I might hear back from Truman)

I figured there are several scenarios that might happen on Thursday:

scenario 1. My director is on his hands and knees and begs me to come back "we were so wrong to fire you. You are the best, please come back. I never liked that Assistant director, so I fired her"

scenario 2. I go down on my hands and knees and beg for forgiveness. Pride goes out the window. I offer to clean the bathrooms and re tar the roof. Tell them how right they were to fire me.

scenario 3. My director says "what are you thinking? You were fired, you can't come back! Can't you take a hint!"

scenario 4. My director says "I called you here because we want the men's bathroom keys back. We are on a tight budget.

Time will tell

Job hunting continues Part 3

This week hasn't been very productive with job hunting until today. I had an interview with Kansas City Regional Center, which I was very impressed with. It seemed like something I would enjoy doing. Unfortately my interview was rather short because they said they had a tight schedule, so I didn't get to ask all the questions that I would have liked to. Right after the interview, the HR lady took me to a clinic and had me do a drug test (maybe they thought I was on something, or maybe they are interested, I really don't know). It is so hard to know what these people are thinking.
I also received a call from Jackson County Court for a Intensive Juvenile Probation Officer position. They want me to come in and take a test on Friday. I would also love that position. I did my internship with probation and loved it. I have pretty much wanted to be a PO since I got into this field. I hope I don't blow it.
I also received noticification from the state of Missouri to come in next week and take a merit test for a Case Manager and a Social Worker positions. Those would also be nice to land.
Lastly, I got a call from Johnson County Developmental Disabilities and they want me to come in and meet the staff that I would be supervising as well as the consumers (the people they serve). So that sounds like something might happen with them. The problem is, that I'm not really that excited about working there. The pay isn't that great, but it is a position with Johnson County which could open some other doors. There are also promotional opportunities. I would work a four day week (save some money in babysitting) and my schedule would be from 1-11pm Mon, Tues, Thrus, and Friday (No Homer's Thursday night and not a lot of time with family). So as you can see, it definately has it's draw backs, but on the other hand, I'm getting desperate. I've been out of work for a month now. The longest I've been unemployed until now has been 2 days.
I have had interviews with Swope Park (I've given up on them) and Truman which sounded like good positions, it's just I haven't heard anything back yet. I would hate to take a job, then leave it for something else (all though I wouldn't be the first person to ever do that). So I don't know what is going to happen.
I'm still wondering whatever to Wyandott Center? Almost 3 weeks ago, I received a call from the Executive Director, stating that I would be offered a chance at another position in the company. He then instructed me to call Randy (my old director)and he would set something up. Either Randy is dead or he is intenionally not returning my calls. After three weeks of trying to call and not hearing anything back, I've concluded that there is no offer. They are just blowing smoke up my _ _ _. I guess what I'm wondering is that why was I told this in the first place? I would have appreciated it if Randy would at least return my call and say "I don't know what you are talking about." It is professional to return a call and Randy was all about being professional. Of course I haven't heard anything back from the Executive Director either. My guess is that there seems to be a breakdown in communication.
At this point I despise Wyandott Center and everyone there (not everyone, just management). To work for a company for 5 1/2 years, never recieve a bad review, lead in stats for 3 years straight, then get fired and never recieve a call back. I was even invited as the only staff to help Congressman Dennis Moore, the mayor of KC,and the director with the groundbreaking of the new center. I'm venting I know, but what have I done to deserve this? Oh yeah, I sexually harassed a 50 year old woman. I better stop doing that.

Pinky's dedication

Last weekend we had Pinky's dedication with both sets of grandparents in town. I was hoping my mom would arrive earlier because she wanted to spend some time with just her and the kids. Unfortunately it didn't work out that way. Both grandparents showed up around the same time. One set wanted to go out to eat, while the other set wanted to stay in. Wah Wah had been cooking all day for her party the next day, and didn't feel like cooking more. I decided to order pizza from Papa Keno's which impressed everyone (They make the best pizza).
Wah Wah's parents spent the night at our house while mine went to a hotel. My mom complained that Wah-Wah's step mother hogged the kids. She probably did but I could really start to see Woogy bonding with her. Up till now, Woogy has always considered my mom to be "grandma", now he understands he has two grandmas.
For church the next day, both grandparents were in attendance with us. I have to admit that I don't always feel very comfortable with my parents in church. They did raise me to be Catholic (they failed miserably), and up until I got married, Catholicism is all they knew. They are used to standing up and sitting down a hundred times, listening to a 5 min sermon, and quietly leaving service with out talking to anyone. Typically there isn't a lot of praising God or people enjoying themselves.
Anyway, Wah-Wah's two sisters also attended and brought their kids, so we had more family with us than normal. When the pastor said the prayer, I think everyone, including the helpers in the nursey, where amazed that Pinky didn't cry when the Pastor was holding her. Typically, no one but Wah-Wah can hold her for more then 10 seconds before she starts crying.
I enjoyed the Pastor's prayer all up to the point where he prayed that I reach people in my work place. I told myself, "yeah, that would be nice if I actually had a place to work." I kind of wanted to interrupt the Pastor and say that "I'm unemployed, why don't we pray for that?" But that would have been rude, and besides, the Pastor had no way of knowing that I am unemployed.
Afterwards, the whole family came back to our house for chile. At that point, I was kind of happy that no one else had come since we barely had room to sit all those people in our humble home.

Job Hunting Continues Part 2

I got my first paycheck today---from the unemployment office. Easiest money I ever earned. Unfortunately it won't go on forever but God bless the person that thought of unemployment benefits.
Well job hunting continues. Everyday I wake up and say that "this will be the day I get a job", but it never happens. Yesterday I had two interviews. The first one was at Johnson County Developmental Supports. I interviewed for a senior residential staff position. I'm not thrilled about the idea of working in a group home again. The pay isn't that great, but there are at least promotional opportunities. I think the interview went well, however the hiring person said if I get the job, all the staff that I would supervise would be jealous since they are all applied for it too.
The other position was at Truman Medical Center for a Case Manager position. I interviewed first with the HR lady. She said that I would be a good addition to the company, and felt confident that I would get the position. Then she sent me over to interview with one of the supervisors. I've done better interviews before. First, the supervisor didn't seem to have much personality, so she didn't really laugh at my sense of humor. Sensing this, I decided to keep any sarcastic comments to myself. I then felt like that I was bore. Secondly, she sat half way across the room with no table between us. I don't think that is a set up for good conversation. Unless the HR lady decides who gets hired, I'm not getting my hopes up.
Next week, I only have one interview set up Jackson County. Since they want a copy of my college transcripts, I'm not getting my hopes up on this one either (especially if they look at my stats and biology grades).

Ode to the Smiths

My favorite lyrics by the Smiths

"Sometimes I feel more fulfilled,
making Christmas cards with the mentally ill"
----- Frankly, Mr. Shankly

"It is so easy to laugh
It is so easy to hate
It takes strength to be gentle and kind"
------I know it's over

"Sweetness, Sweetness I was only joking
when I said I'd like to smash every tooth
in your head"
------Bigmouth Strikes Again

"If a double decker bus
crashes into us
To die by your side
is such a heavenly way to die"
------There is a light that never goes out

"I'd like to drop my trousers to the Queen
Every sensible child will know this means
The poor and the needy
are selfish and greedy on her terms
-------Nowhere fast

"Poor woman
strangled in her very own bed as she read
But that's OK
because she was old and she would have died anyway"
-------Sweet and tender Hooligan

"Sixteen, clumsy and shy
I went to London and I
I booked myself in at the Y....WCA
I said "I like it here-can I stay?
Do you have a vacancy for a Back scrubber?"
--------Half a Person

"Burn down the Disco
Hang the blessed DJ
Because the music that they constantly play
It says nothing to me about my life"
--------Panic

"Spending warm summer days in doors
writing frightening verse
To a buck tooth girl in Luxembourg"
--------Ask

"Will the world end in the night time?
(I really don't know)
Or will the world end in the day time?
(I really don't know)
And is there any point in ever having children?
(I really don't know)
What I do know is that we are here and it is now"
---------Stretch out and wait

"I wear black on the outside
Because black is how I feel on the inside"
---------Unlovable

"Girlfriend in a coma
I know, I know--it's serious
There were times when I could
have strangled her
But you know I would hate anything
to happen to her"
----------Girlfriend in a Coma

"an emergency stop
I smelt the last ten seconds of life
I crashed down on the crossbar
and the pain was enough to make
a shy, bald Buddist reflect
and plan a mass murder"
----------Stop me if you think you've heard this one before

"I've come to wish you an unhappy birthday
because you're evil
and you lie
and if you should die
I may feel slightly sad
but I won't cry"
-----------Unhappy birthday

Discovering the insurance biz

Shakedust is right as far as what the Primerica does-- train you, and the responsibility falls on you to meet your own clients. There is little risk that the company takes. It is a risk that I'm investing little in. The training is paid so you get your money back after you take your test. Plus I'm learning a lot about the insurance biz.
The guy that got me into this is a devote Christian and attends the same church that a certain "Visionaneering" person is now attending. I met with him for a few hours today over lunch. We talked a lot about faith and ministry. He says that he uses Primerica to help others get out of debt and if he can't, then he won't bother them. I thought that was pretty noble for a insurance guy.
I come from a totally different world than sales. As a Case Manager, my clients or customers didn't owe me anything for my services. A occasional "thank you" was always appreciated. But the bottom line is that you are not trying to make a buck off this person so your intentions are mostly sincere. But then I wonder if you are trying to make a buck, are you going to be trust worthy or are you going to say anything to sell your product?
I have had more than a few dealings with sales people who are your friend all up till the point you decide not to buy what they are selling. For example, I'll never forget the time I decided not to buy a truck from Randy Curnow Ford. I thought the salesman was going to break my legs. Literally, him and a few other salesman were ganging up on me. I sure don't want to be that kind of person.
I don't know if I'm cut out for this to be honest. If I can reduce the debt for a few people, then I guess I did OK. So far, I've learned a lot about insurance, and even met a guy who is on the board at Johnson County Mental Health who says he might be able to "pull some strings", so maybe things might work out (of course that is very optimistic thing for me to say)

Follow up to a Little Help

There seems to be a lot of concern with this Primamerica thing. Trust me everyone, I have no intention of giving them money or doing one of those pyramid scams. I have no intention of making this a new career either.
The fact is, that I've got nothing to do all day but sit and dwell on the fact that I'm unemployed- which is very depressing. It is hard to sit and wait for a phone call that will never come. Since my wife is now the bread winner, I figure I could make a little extra money on the side since we are going to need it. If and when a job is offered, I plan to leave this far behind. I'd much rather do what I was doing than this Primamerica thing (unless of course I become filthy rich at it, which is unlikely.)
Finding a job in my field that pays well is not easy. It is also important to note that I am not licensed by the state which means all jobs in the hospital I'm not qualified to do. Don't get me wrong, I want a license but that means 2 years of school plus a semester of a unpaid internship. I am considering this as enrollment comes around again.
On a follow up note, it is now clear that the center I use to work for is jerking me around. Despite the fact that the director himself called me and said that I will be given another position, seems to be a bunch of crap. They have not been returning calls for several days now. I guess this is a pretty sick joke. It might have been a little kinder to say "you're not coming back" than "we'll take care of you and give you another job."

the job hunting continues...

Much to my surprise, the phone hasn't been ringing off the hook with job offers. I interviewed at 3 places last week were I felt the interviews went well, but no calls yet. Back when I was doing interviews, I usually could give you a answer in a week. I actually got someone hired the same day as her interview. No such luck for me yet.
But now something else has come up. Since I was "fired" various co workers I've talked to say I should take it up with Wyandott's executive director, Pete. Everyone says that he is a really nice guy and very understanding. This morning, I decided since I have nothing to lose, I called Pete's assistant and said I need to talk with The MAN. (the MAN),Pete called me back and said that he wasn't aware that I had been "fired"(even though his name appears on my severance papers)and said he doesn't see a reason why I could not have been transfered. He said that Randy, my director, holds me in very high regard and wants to meet with me.
I'm not sure I know what this is coming too. I told Pete that I don't feel I could go back to my old department with that dirty snake that fired me. Pete says that he thinks there are openings in the adult program but he thinks I might be happier working with kids.
With all this I feel like I'm standing at a crossroads in my life. Could I or would I return to Wyandott Center? Should I keep looking for another agency? Or should I do the postal thing which seems to be getting a lot of support.
I just had a few other options thown at me from a different kind of business--loans. Despite the fact that I know nothing about loans, a gentleman at American Mortgage said that I could work there as a loan officer. It's no sweat for him since this is a commission only job (I don't think I'm sold on this idea.
Then today, I met with a guy from Primerica and was offered a chance to sell insurance. Now I don't know a thing about insurance, but the guy said that he could train me in 3 months. I believe he also said that it was a paid training. He said the job is more psychology than knowing numbers plus he said your potential for income is unlimited. Sounds like there is a catch. If it is this easy to sell term life insurance, then how come everyone is not doing it?
I think I might visit with this guy again since I honestly have nothing better to do. But if he should ask me to send him a check to get me started, I'm gone.

Miracle pt1

"miracle pt1"

A penny for your thoughts
It looks like the weight of the world
is on your shoulders now
You think your going crazy
just when it seems everything will
work itself out
You're driven right back down
You said "it's not fair that a man
walks, when a bird can fly
We have to kick the ground,
stars kiss the sky
Still a spirit lives,
A man has to die"

What's going on?

Not much is the answer. Sitting home all day unemployed sucks. Don't get me wrong, I'm going out applying for jobs. I'm looking them up on the net and calling every lead. So far I've applied for everything I'm qualified for. I even applied at Enterprise, and a few other companies that are out of social services. The hardest part is waiting for the telephone call. When it does ring, I get all excited, only to get let down when I hear how I could save on my college loans.
I was approved for unemployment. I've never had to do that before. Last Friday I walked into Kaw Valley in Olathe. I was interviewed on the spot and the interviewer remembered me from a case we worked on together. I don't know if I want the job though, I would sit in the office all day and would have to find a new foster care placement within 4 hours. The pay kind of sucks too. I also got a call from Juvenile Detention. The pay isn't bad, but the hours are horrible.
I had my first interview yesterday at Swope Park. I think it went pretty well. I didn't stumble at all in the interview and even answered some questions before the interviewer had a chance to ask them. It would be working with mentally ill adults between the ages of 18-25. Thursday I have a another interview. This one is at Kaw Valley as a Runaway Case Manager. I walked into the office and filled out a application, and by the time I left, I had a interview scheduled.
With all this extra time on my hands, I've spent a lot of time writing. Some may call them poems, I like to think of them as songs that have yet to be played. I'm starting a serious that I will be posting shortly.

A Little Update

It has been a while since I last blogged and that is because I've had some very tramatic things going on. Most everyone knows, but I lost my job at Wyandott Center. Yes, after 5 1/2 years of faithful service,countless volunteering on the weekends, and being one of the few people to sign up for the company softball team, I was canned.
My problems at the center started about a year ago, when my old boss JoAnne was asked to resign. JoAnne and I got along really good and I always felt like she had confidence in me. Reason why JoAnne was out nobody really understood, including herself. JoAnne was out and was replaced by Kim. Now to give you a little background, Kim happens to be the gay lover of another director in the agency. She was only with the agency a couple of years. She does not have her master's degree. Her rise to power is awfully fishy. Kim always had it in for me and I found everytime I met with her I was on the defensive.
Then several month's ago Kim annouced that my position was being eliminated and was going to be replaced by people with master's degrees which she would supervise. Again this seemed a little fishy, since she was now supervising people with a higher education then herself. Further more, it threw case managers off of managment and no hope of ever getting back in. So I asked what I was suppose to do now and I was told to go hang out with the Case Managers and make sure they are doing their job. My signature became worthless over night. I was now hanging out with the staff I use to supervise.
Then the night of the Coldplay concert, Kim asked me to come in and told me that a staff said I was being negative, but she refused to tell me who. Then she told me that I had harassed another worker by jokingly offering her a hug. This worker didn't think anything of it, because she knows my personality and was not making a issue of it. She also knows that she is 50 and I'm 31 married with kids. Besides, we are social workers, we hug. It's not like I asked to feel her up or anything. Anyway she sent me home for the rest of the week.
I had a feeling that I was a goner and became very depressed especially since I was not given a chance to talk to anyone about it. Then they told me to come in Monday morning which is never a good sign. I decided to call my good friend Dave in Iowa and asked if he wanted to come down for the weekend. His life is even more messed up than mine, but we can always joke about it. Dave came down for the weekend and helped me take my mind off work.
By Monday however I was pretty worried. I tried to tell myself that I would be OK, because I always had confidence in the center and had been a excellent employee. I had even asked for a transfer. However Monday morning they handed me my walking papers and told me to clear out. I at least got a severence package and will be paid up till the end of October.
I was devestated. I had never seen a future with out Wyandott Center. 5 1/2 years gone. How would I face my family, I was such a failure. On the way home I got a call from another co-worker at the same level as me and he told me that I wasn't alone, and that he had been fired too for lame reasons. But that was little comfort. I could see nothing but black. It was like looking in a dark tunnel with no end. All my depression and suicidal thoughts I had growing up when I was a teenager came back like a flood. I decided at that point the only thing I could do was check myself into the hospital.
I sat in a dark room for 8 hours before some one finally came to get me to tell me my wife was on the phone. I told her that I felt so lost and that I would be no good at home. By the next day, and a lot of medication later, I was feeling better and quickly got out of acute care and went to just observation. The day after that (Wed) I felt that I needed to get home and help with the kids. Plus nobody is going to hire a mental patient, so I asked the docter to release me and he did.
Being home without a job is hard. We continue to send our kids to the sitter so I can focus all my time into finding another job. I have been basically hand delivering all my resumes and got my first call back. I have a interview on Monday at Swope Park Mental Health.
I have also been considering getting out of the mental health field. It's not that I don't like it, but the pay sucks. For some reason I can't explain, I'm thought about to studying to be a postal worker. The pay is far more than I'll ever make in mental health. Plus it has promotional opportunities, a cool outfit, and a nice pension. I don't know, maybe this postal thing will go nowhere. I not sure I know what direction the Lord is calling me to. Maybe things happen for a reason. Right now I'm not very certain where I'll be.